Tuesday, 2 March 2010

My life is better than Rob's



Oh ok, so maybe as a general statement then most of the time the title of this post isn't true, but for a while this afternoon I was pretty convinced that it was.


"Surely not, Stan.  Look, I get to have a go with a real megaphone, bet you've always wanted to try it!"

Shut up Rob you great big show off ;o) 

So, Harry had gone to bed for his nap so I decided to go out in the garden and clean the rabbits out.  The sun was shining and I'd taken my iPod with me but decided not to put it on.  The only sounds were the birds singing and the brook bubbling at the bottom of the field behind the house and it was bliss.  I spent a good half hour clearing away soiled rabbit bedding and putting the clean in - I didn't even need a coat on because the sun was so warm.  And then it hit me how happy I was - not necessarily about the rabbit poo, but I guess it's not that high a price to pay - and right then I felt sure that there was no way in the world that at that moment in time Rob was as happy as I was.  No, not even if he was currently lying in bed with a heineken in one hand, a ciggie in the other and Kristen sucking his dick.  Although I am willing to accept that it may come close (yes, I did type come after a sucking dick comment, what of it, perv?)


My cleaning skills being inspected by my stalker chicken.

I guess to some people fame looks like a fantasy lifestyle, they see glamour (although obv not at the Remember Me Premiere, I still don't appreciate Tramp Chic) and money and getting your own way, but when we hear Rob make a comment like he did yesterday about not doing interviews if he didn't have to then I think we can assume that actually these past few days have probably been pretty annoying for him, although he seems to accept it and be gracious about it.

I can understand the pressures of having a stalker after my time outside too as I mention on the pic above. How celebs put up with it all the time I have no idea.  I managed to get a pic of mine before she got one of me:



She bloody pecked my finger while I was cleaning the rabbits out too.  Sneaked up behind me while I had my hand on the floor and mistook my finger for a juicy worm or something.  Actually, for that specific second I'll admit that Rob probably had it better whatever he was doing.  She then followed me around for about a quarter of an hour which quickly got boring.  Poor Rob.
 
So here's to the first signs of spring: the lambs in the field down the lane, the bulbs starting to shoot in my tubs in the front garden, the rabbit's winter fur starting to come out in huge clumps everywhere and the veg plot getting ready for action!


What do you like best about springtime? 

19 comments:

Jelena @ Twiholic said...

LMAO! Stan, I am still laughing hysterically about this post. That part about stalker chicken is phenomenal. Either that, or I have a really weird sense of humor.

But, I couldn't agree more with your post. I don't see any possible way Rob could be genuinely happy. While my post yesterday was pretty fucking depressing, I did say in it that I am currently happier than I've ever been. ;D

I saw your comment on Twitarded, and you said exactly what I was thinking after closely inspecting what the girls were wearing. I loved Rob's outfit, but Kristen. OMFG. I love the jacket, and even the shoes, but those gawd awful gold lace pants, with a plain black shirt tucked in? I think she identified with The Runaways a little too much for my liking. And, I'm not even gonna touch the hair. We all remember what happened the last time I did that, pmsl.

And while I love the top of Emilie's dress, the bottom is just horrendous. I thought it looked like a scooped up curtain, but your analogy was better: like the bottom got stuck in her panties when she went to the loo.

Stan said...

Hi Jelena, glad you liked the post. I have to say, Stalker Chicken is preferential to Ninja Cockerel who used to live here and sneak up on you. He once chased me to the top of the hill in the field and everyone else just stood at the house laughing at me. Bastards. Cocks are actually quite scary when they're attacking you know ;o)

Mary said...

*nods* I've been attacked by a few cocks in my time Stan ;)

Lovely pics of your abode. I'm looking forward to no more frigging snow!! Bring on the warm weather so I can wear my flip flops wooohooo!!

Oh I'm after some help too. Does anyone know where I can find a free and easy to use website? I want to set one up for my cakes x

Honolulu Girl from Trueblood Twilight said...

OMG, where you live is beautiful. I want to know more about you, forget Rob for one second. Ah, maybe it's my fantasy fairytales set in England coming into play. Your photos are stunning, including crazy chicken photo.

Anyways, I've only been in Hawaii about 5 years but I can tell you, it doesn't change much and that might be the one thing I miss most about California. The changing of the seasons. For us here, it is slightly cooler than summer time, and maybe more rain but overall, just as miserably hot as it is all year round, with the average temps in the high 70's or low 80's. How about we switch for a month, like in that movie Holiday? (or whatever it's called. The one with Cameron Diaz)

Twilight Mommy said...

HG if you wanna see some real weather switch with me LOL Good ol' cold as fucking hell Ontario Canada! I'd be happy to leave my 6 months of snow behind and trade for even a few mins in Hawaii!
Your backyard is gorgeous Stan! And your stalker is a red head too? They are firey! Watch out for that one LOL j/k!

NibbleitPattinsonakaNebilet said...

Aw Stan, I'm so gonna come play out at yours in the spring, take the boys out of the cupboard, spend some quality time at the park, chase the chicken or choke it if I had the chance with Rob bwahahaha.

I love the sun, I get that SAD disorder I swear to got, I hate the dark nights and cold, if I win the lottery I'm moving to Florida 6months of the year! When spring is sprung, I get even happier than I am now (its possible)

I must say i felt sorry for him recently he looked so tired and I guess fame has its price. Maybe I'll be famous on here and that's all I need xxx

Mrs. P @ TwiBite said...

Stan---what a blissfully happy place you have there..and you're right, I'm sure he is nowhere as happy as you were today.

WOuld you believe there is still snow on the ground here? Depressing...

XOXOXOXO

Z Any Mouse said...

Lol, does the stalker chicken have a name? My favorite thing about spring is it brings a lot of birds through Southern California. I have a hummingbird feeder in front of my kitchen window, and I have taken the bee guards off. We get a ton of different species flying through on their way to somewhere else. They are the best pets, and I don't have to clean up after them.

Jayla said...

i like fall. but you asked about the spring... ummmm hmmmm... oh the days are longer. i loathe going to work in the dark & coming home in the dark. People watching is so much better in the spring..people, they linger (a lil' longer).

@stan gorgeous view. i miss living in the country.

Dangrdafne said...

It is so nice to hear you happy Stan :)
Spring is my favorite season. I love the smell of Spring - new growth, rain, dirt. I love all the baby animals. I love the green and the flowers. I love that it gets warmer and brighter. I just love Spring. And now I hate that I have to go outside and there will be snow! and maybe more tomorrow :(
I am going to visit Stan, right now!

Dangrdafne said...

PS I love the stalker chicken and the story. Great pictures too. My mother in law is deathly afraid of chickens, just a side note there ;)

Jelena @ Twiholic said...

I came back because I remembered that I forgot to say something in regards to how celebrities deal with stalkers. One of my friends is married to this guy who you used be in a really popular band in Canada, called I Mother Earth (the band doesn't exist anymore). Anyway, she told me that one night, the two of them were followed for blocks by this one fan girl. So, at one point, when he'd had enough, Bruce turned around and started talking to the girl. He asked her if what she thought was nice, following them around, not giving them any privacy, etc, etc, and the girl apologized and went her way.

I'm not sure whether this would work for Rob, but he might try it. In case there's a whole horde of people following him, he could use that megaphone, Stan, to address them all simultaneously. :D

TwiWeasel said...

@ Stan - It's wonderful to hear (read) you're happy! You've been through a lot lately, and you deserve a bit of sunshine and happiness!! (((BIG HUG)))

I love when it gets warmer and the leaves are all coming out on the trees and the grass is coming up! The wheat is so pretty in the spring - we've got lots of that around here!

I'm not fooling myself though, we'll probably have more snow yet. We had snow last April. In fact, I got married in April, and we had to cancel rehearsal because there was a blizzard! That was on Friday, and on Tuesday the sun was out, the snow was gone and it was 70 degrees...yep, that's the crazy Kansas weather for ya!

Stacked Like Sookie said...

It's gorgeous where you live Stan I often say to my husband (who has been to the UK) honestly, is England THAT pretty & he always says yes. I live in the country too but we don't have chooks coz I hate them (the only good chook is a BBQ'd one)& if I'm honest, I'm a bit scared of them too coz of what you said about the pecking & being chased by them. We've got gorgeous cows & I hate the fact that we eat them & we never give them names coz the rules are if it has a name you cán't eat it & I don't think I could be a vego.
I get that fucking SAD disorder too Nipps. I'm relieved it's a recognised thing now & not just me being shitty assed about the cold.
I rekon you live in paradise @HG but I have to admit I quite enjoy the change of seasons even though we've had a really strange summer this year, cool & wet.
I couldn't think of anything worse than being famous, it's bad enough living in a small town & being the subject of gossip without the whole world speculating about every aspect of your life.
Shit I did rave on a bit today didn't I?

17foreverlisa said...

@Stan - Loved your thoughtful post and the pictures. Still smiling :) I remember when you posted pictures awhile back and I had the same reaction as HG, thinking the setting reminded me so much of the movie The Holiday.

I also quite enjoyed the visual you gave us of Rob getting his drink on ;)

Spring has definitely sprung, which means baseball at our house. Play ball!!

Lisa

TigerlilyRose said...

@Stan...Glad to hear things are returning to good for you! I LOVE all the stuff you said today. Your scenery is beautiful and I am totally jealous that you have green and NO mud and can clean the rabbits out without getting covered in the muck! I live in the middle of a Swampland a present and can't wait for it to dry up. The snow is gone, but there is mud and water everywhere.

What I love most about spring is of course...,My garden...I am a gardening addict, to the point I actually pissed my husband off with it last week, when I told him I went and bought a greenhouse (just a wee little ole cheap one, he won't even notice it...LOL) In fact I love it so much I have a BLOG about it, yeesh. But you all know that I think, so I won't plug myself any more ( Greater Good Gardens hehe) Anyway I
CAN'T WAIT to get out in my gardens and rearrange and plant and weed...well, maybe not weed...but after this winter, I will take anything! My poor bunnies need some freshness too, poor things.

I am very sure we are all (or at least most of us) much happier at this moment in time with our modest lives outside of the spotlight, with our laptops and our obsessions, than Rob or Kristen or any of them. Thanks for reminding us how great it really is!

Banshee713 said...

Whoa, Stan, where you live seriously looks like where I live. All green and farmy. Anyhoo, what I love most about spring is seeing the birds start nesting. And I love the way my two bunnies get all frisky and hoppy. What I fucking hate about spring is the fertilizer spreading. There are weeks in Feb when my whole house reeks of cow shit. I don't even live on a farm for fuck sake!

@Jelena: I have a feeling that if Rob did that, it would just go all Life of Brian: "How shall we fuck off, oh Lord?"

smartEpantz said...

I can literally feel your emotions oozing out of this post. Man. I really felt your bliss come through (minus the stalking chicken, which was pretty rad too) and was very in the moment with you. The pics blew me away. I seriously transported myself to the freshly green, open expanse.
Thank you much, you really made me yearn for spring!
I live in the frozen tundra of the northern midwest US, we still have about 2ft of snowpack. ~sigh~
XOXO
E

Stan said...

Thanks everyone. I am lucky to live here, it's really pretty, although at the moment the fields are a bit yellowed from all of the freezing weather we've been having. About five minutes drive up the road are some stunning hills and views too.

No, the stalker chicken doesn't have a name, we have too many pecking about, I'd never recognise it again unless it did some repeat stalking anyway!

@ HG, I can't believe you'd swap Hawaii for here! Nutter!