Monday 1 February 2010

Me & New Moon - I got issues

Morning Ho's.  I went to see New Moon for a third and final time on the big screen yesterday!  WOOOOO!  It was very exciting and I really enjoyed it, but I think I may have a problem.  I ruined it for myself (and quite possibly my sister in law who I went with) by getting distracted by those little imperfections I always seem to get hung up on.  You know the ones, like for example:


And I seem unable to suffer in silence, no, I have to point them out to who I'm with too.  In every scene that it's relevant.  I know, I know, I even annoy myself.  And the more times I see it, the more things I find to be obsessed with. 

So, for example in the Edward-Bella break up scene, am I sitting there thinking how tragic and sad and moving it is?  Of course not!  You know me better than that.  No, I'm looking at this:



Thinking "You know, Rob's eyes look a little odd sometimes.  Like the skin at the inside corners is pulling a little tight.  Hmm, it reminds me a bit of one of the managers where I used to work, only hers was waaaaay worse.   And look at his ear, he looks like a pixie again.  It did that in Twilight too, in the cafeteria scene where he has sweatmarks."

What a waste of the break-up scene!  And when he kisses Bella on the forehead, all I can think of is this spoof where he leaves all the lipstick on her.

And in the Jake-Bella break-up scene where Jake looks like this:


Yes!  Look!  He's all wet, and angry and muscly and...What the hell is with his neck?  In some angles it's the same width as his head so he looks like Beaker from the Muppets


Yep, as soon as I put my cut-out together I forgot all about those nails.  Because look at his neck *sigh*

And then the camera angle changes to look at Bella and all you can see of him is a side neck view.  And it's soooo long, like a tortoise or something.

And so this carried on throughout the whole film.  Until it got to the Volturi, then my first thoughts were Nibbleit's psychic dicktective predictions and all I can think of is her descriptions of their peens.  Until I start wondering why Marcus has no socks on.  And that I can totally see why Michael Sheen got cast as Tony Blair and that actually he still reminds me of him even when he's playing Aro.  So then I'm watching it as Tony as Aro.

Other random thoughts were-
Jasper looks nothing loike Jackson Rathbone (although he does bear a passing resemblance to Brummie comedian Frank Skinner as previously discussed).  How can we be sure that it is actually him playing the part?

Have you noticed how Bella is touching Carlisle as he fixes her cut arm?  She's such a ho. 

I can only think of this pic when Bella is lying on the forest floor:


And this is obviously why I have zero self-confidence myself, because I just assume that everyone is as caught up in these things as I am.  You all know how I feel about Rob & Taybait, so maybe it's a good sign.  I tested myself out and challenged myself to pick fault with Laurent.  And, nope, he does nothing for me so when I look at him there must be something I can pick out to focus on.  And nope, nothing.  Charlie?  Ok, so the pics that Mary posted were ok, but with his 'tache, no.  So what can we pick on?  Nope, looks fine to me.

Gah, Mr Mary's right, I really am such a freak lol!

Anyway, other more important news today - it's February!  Which means Happy New Rob Month (as Nibbles texted me this morning) to those of us with Rob calendars, and also....


Thanks to http://www.newmoonmovie.org/2010/01/taylor-lautner-the-final-countdown/ for this, I know you'll all love it, especially you Lisa.  Be ready to cast your hot pokers aside ladies, you don;t need to burn your eyes out after looking at these pics for much longer! 

Oh and my fave comment here was this one "I bet no one is ever more nervous about his 18th birthday than poor Tay. I think the best birthday presents he'd better be asking for are bodyguards lol" ROFL!

Ok, off to the cupboard for 5 mins, Mr Stan's at work ;o)

31 comments:

Becky said...

Wow! You have been busy!
You should count yourself lucky geting to see it 3 times, lol! I've only been once as none of my 'friends' would go with me! They just don't understand. :(

Rofl @beaker & chimpsten, you made me spill my tea everywhere!

I've never seen that New Moon spoof before, I esp love the bit where he flexes hs pecks and where 'Jacob' comes skipping out of the house to save 'Bella', lol!

Fab post, cheered up my day no end!

Stan said...

Aww thanks Becky. I love that spoof. I always think of it at the 'kiss me' eyebrow raising bit too and when Edward goes after the break up, I always think of him behind the trees lol.

Sorry for the spillage ;o)

Stan said...

Oh, and Nibbles's work computers have gone down again so she'll be quiet for a bit lol!

Becky said...

@Stan, I bet she has steam coming out of her ears, lol!

Nessa Lomiva said...

Gemms, I'm gonna give you benefit of the doubt, because you've been through so much lately, but man, woman, you need to chill! You're ruining the experience for yourself. Why would you want to do that? If something bothers me in a scene, in a movie like NM that I'm desperate to love, I will always look for the thing that I like in that scene. You know, it bothers me that Rob is so fucking pale, almost ashlike in Volterra, but I focus on his happy trail, and then it all just goes away.

Now, with all this being said, why aren't you taking photos of Chimpsten? Do you want us to starve to death? :D

Stan said...

Jelena, if you knew the scenes she wanted me to set up you'd understand why I'm putting it off! Have ordered a new lead for my camera so it'll be a couple of days before I can upload them yet so I suggest you cheat ;o)

Nessa Lomiva said...

Hm, you got me intrigued now. What could she be possibly asking you to do... wait, from which shoot was it?

Stan said...

Oh, I've got 3 different ones to do! She's already got her mitts on one of the results which is why she's getting so impatient I think, it is rather fab if I do say so myself

Anonymous said...

Oh yes...it is rather fab and an instant classic, if i do say so!

Stan...I feel your pain. I'm having a little trouble with the fact that his left eyelid is a teeny bit droopy and you can see it in a lot of photos as of late...by the time he's 50 he's gonna have one eye look more closed than the other; mark my words.

Beeker from the muppets! LMAO!!!

TwiWeasel said...

Dammit, Stan...now I gotta go change my pants before work cuz I pissed myself from laughing so hard at the Taybait/Beaker thing!

Sorry I've been gone all weekend ladies...family stuff you know.

I'll pop in again later...maybe...I gotsa lotsa fan fic to catch up on! Oh, alright, I'll come back...

Stan said...

Thanks Mrs.P, I'll be sure to look out for the droopy eyelid. *sigh*

Dangrdafne said...

I love the side by side of Taylor and Beaker LOL!

Can't wait for Chimpsten!

Stan said...

It's all in Mrs.P's hands now. I'm bloody knackered, that took me all day!

And I can confirm that FSE is sporting the droopy eyelid, so thanks for that Mrs.P. He'll be in the closet with Beacob before you know it.

Stan said...

I meant cupboard, PMSL!

Becky said...

@Stan rofl @ Beacob!

NibbleitPattinsonakaNebilet said...

Beacob- Oh man you just know that is gonna stick and as for in the closet well I dunno what to say. I can imagine Beacob in there but no way is the Precious going in the closet.

Now I have images of dirty dancing and Edward in a black vest top, walking over to a table, looking at the other Quelietes and saying no one puts Beacob in the corner. Bwahahahaha, I've had the time of my life and lift....

oh dear, oh dear, can you tell I'm a little hysterical, computers went off at work and no one could do anything except for me for fucks sake. I got to work on the server. Whoo bloody hoo. Still I guess I got a lot of work done, only to discover another mountain of it hiding.

I think I wanna go in the closet with Edward, I think I NEED to go in the closet with Edward. Lemma grab a bottle of something (alcohol, lube, whatever I grab first) and I'll be in there darling....it'll make a change from the attic anyway...
She's the one they call Dr Feelgood (yeah baby) she's the one that makes you feel alright (sings to self whilst grabbing supplies) Right I'm off to the closet...

Zanymouse said...

Stan, thanks for reminding me it's February. I had to go flip the calendar before reading the rest of your post. Goodbye to Oscar Rob *sniff*, but helloooo Cannes Rob!

I've seen NM five times, and do the same thing you do, adding something new each time. Manky nails, Bella saying 'like' instead of 'likes', and the list goes on...

Zanymouse said...

@Nebilet - LMAO at 'No one puts Beacob in the corner'! I can just see Eddie twirling Beacob over his head like a helicopter, lol. You've moved to the closet now? Are you holding out on us, or what?!

NibbleitPattinsonakaNebilet said...

Just a change of scenery and I think the Precious needed some one on one haha so to speak. Bless him, he's been neglected with all the others in the attic. Think I myt take them out on a day trip, sounds like a post to me LMAOOOO

Honolulu Girl-Suz said...

You know, it's funny. I thought the same thing too about Taylor. He's got a great body for his age.. fuck. For any man's age, but he does have an unusually long neck. I noticed that long ago, from the promo pics and I won't say it bugs me, but I just notice it.. That's all.
Hehehe. The video... oh, my. I can't watch, Taylor videos. Just ewww. No. Yuck, to have any young photo mixed in, just ruined it for me. But I also have a son, 17 too, so maybe that's why. :)

Stan said...

I have to say HG, that the young pics freaked me out. There are still a good number of pics out there that make me cringe, but thankfully there are more and more that are acceptable ;o). I couldn't resist posting it though, not when I know we have so many fans on here.

Jayla said...

@Nibbles “Quelietes and saying no one puts Beacob in the corner. Bwahahahaha, I've had the time of my life and lift....” OMGawd you made me spit out my pear.

“Have you noticed how Bella is touching Carlisle as he fixes her cut arm? She's such a ho”. … Yes that scene total reminds me of _Happy Birthday To Me_ where Bella seduces Carlisle. (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4623133/1/Happy_Birthday_To_Me)

“Jasper looks nothing like Jackson Rathbone” _ Can Summit just ‘clean up Jackson’ (much like they finally did with Rob) so he looks like an adorable Jasper instead of possessed freak?

mmMoxie said...

I have the same gripes about the movie as you. I'm sure we'll find a shit load once the DVD comes out. I really hate to say it but NM was a disappointment for me. Hopefully Eclipse will be better.

TwiWeasel said...

Having a really fucking busy day at work...

@ Stan - I'll get Victoria and Riley in the mail to you today. See what this obsession has reduced me to? I'm stealing toys from my kids. *rolls eyes*

17foreverlisa said...

Well, Stan, you redeemed yourself by admitting that Taycob has a tortoise neck. I first noticed it and thought WTF? in the infamous motorcycle crash scene after he takes off his shirt and is leaning over her. My mind wanders trying to avoid his under-age abs. LOL!

I know what you mean about Rob's eye. It's hard to describe just what the deal is, but I do notice/think about it from time to time. He really is human, after all. Huh. I'll be glad to take him home with me, girls, if it bothers you that much, though. At the very least, Stan, box up FSE and mail him to me. He SO needs to come out of the closet ;)

Loved the spoof video. I didn't realize there was a whole series of them. A co-worker sent me one awhile back where "Bella" gets run over in the parking lot because they are so annoyed with her, which was funny as hell.

And since I've noticed that Marcus wasn't wearing any socks, Kristen has her hand on Carlisle's peter...I mean on Peter's side... etc., I apparently watch the movie the same way you do. Of course, after nine screenings, that was bound to happen. Just for the record, I'm with Jelena as far as Rob is concerned. I never find fault with him and zero in on the positives.

And please, for the love of God, let us see Jackson more and Jasper less. Making him wear his hair that way in the movies is just down right mean!!

Great post, as always, Stan. Can't wait to see the Chimpsten pics and read the Mrs. P's responses to the TwiBite Challenge. It's going to be epic!

Lisa

Dangrdafne said...

@ Lisa - are you trying to get me fired?? You can't post something this freaking hilarious here and have me read it at work...
"Kristen has her hand on Carlisle's peter...I mean on Peter's side..." Oh My!!!!

17foreverlisa said...

@Dangrdafne - Sorry! LOL!!

mrsjbreen said...

OMG...you have so tainted Beaker for me...he is like my favorite muppet.

I am so excited for DVD viewings of New Moon. We must start thinking up the drinking games now. Oh my...wouldn't that be fun...simultaneous viewing with a drinking game (no Kstew "blinking" shots..we would be tossed to soon). Like drunk mad labs with some viewing pleasure....

Stan said...

What about a shot everytime Beacob's teeth dazzle you and make you flinch? LOL

Becky said...

@Stan I can't help but giggle whenever anyone says Beacob now! you have ruined him for me, lol. By the time the dvd comes out I wont be able to watch any of it with a straight face!!

Anonymous said...

Twi Weasel- Good to hear from you. Was worried about all that snow last week.

Stan- Loved the Jacob/Beaker comparison. Don't be too hard on yourself like "I'm a freak". Duh, I thought we were all a little freaky & that's what brought us together. We love you just as you are.