I feel terrible, Nibbles has diagnosed me with the Twiflu that has apparently been going round. I feel the kind of terrible that mkaes you want to smash yourself over the head with a brick and ram a poker into your ear because it's so sore. You know what makes me feel worse? That I actually have a legitimate reason for sitting doing nothing all day but my head even hurts too much to look at the computer screen (so I apologise if this has loads of typos cos I'm doing it looking at the keyboard) so I can't even spend it reading fic.
The day got ff to a fantastic start when I tried to get Mr Stan out of bed to help me with the kids (not successful). He finally got up when our 2yr old Stanlet appeared with shampoo all over his head from the bathroom. Yep, no way I'm sorting something that didn't happen on my watch today.
Anyway, enough of my moaning, I've been told that I'm incredibly grumpy this morning by Mr Stan (wonder why, nobhead?), so let's get on with the FFF.
Starlit Violets chose Jelena as her winnner last week and Jelena has come up with her quesgtions at incredibly short notice so thanks Jelly. Ok, over to you:
Thank you SV for picking me. I know it must've been that Sarah Jessica Parker comment that made you decide on the winner, right? Nothing bonds us girls like a mutual object of our violent desire. Therefore, my questions today will all be either about violence or desire. This shouldn't surprise you, cause you know I'm a nosy cow who loves prying into your sex life. Here we go. Buckle up.
1. What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy?
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Tell us a detailed account of what happened.
3. Describe one of your favourite movie sex scenes?
4. Was there a part in the Twilight saga that you bored with? If not, were there parts that you felt so angry with you wanted to rip the pages out and burn them - choose one that pissed you off the most - but it cannot be Isle Esme because technically those pages are already missing, and we were all upset by them, so it must be something else.
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them? You know, stuff like ripping their hair by the root, punching them in the face, choking them to death, that kinda stuff?
I'll be back later to give you my own answers.
Jelena x
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35 comments:
Oh Stan! You may be ill, but you chose fantabulous photos for this post. Woman, you're a bloody genius!
Poor Stan, I feel for you, at least mine isn't Twiflu its just lack of sleep. Doc has given me Tamazepam to help me sleep, I'm scared cos its addictive and I can't drink lol. I don't have an addictive personality apart from chocolate & sex so thats good. All the crap I used to put in my system, cannabis in various forms, speed, coke, ammys and I came out fine I think lol,it was a long time ago in my mad and wild teens & early 20's. Kicking smoking was easy too, alcohol doesn't bother me so that's all good. I'm gonna try it on sunday see how it goes cos I'm going out carousing Saturday night as its my birthday on monday if I haven't told anyone, sure I mentioned it to Stan, Mary & Becky a billion times-I get excited very easily. Look out for a special birthday post on monday pmsl anyhoo Jelly babes you're a maniac, I love you, you're a woman after my own heart X
Stan you're wonderful as ever, ram that poker up Mr Stan's arse!! Big hugs for you x
1)Wildest fantasy yet to be lived um oh boy if I say, I'm giving you knowledge of one I have done erm ok no one hit me and its curiosity y'anno ok a 3 some all girls arghhhh I fucking said it, there its out in the open....No one need ever fucking worry if I meet them cos I'm not gonna jump on them besides I'd never cheat on my husband
2)Caught by boyfriends brother who shared room with my boyfriend. I was staying over they'd all gone to work so I thought, room is gloomy, little light through the curtains I'm horny yada yada yada needless to say it was only after I finished that Barry (yes his name was Barry, the boyfriend was called Keith)jumped out of bed with a boner and said I'm going for a wank. Great family! Reason I didn't see him was his bed was over other side of room, I still speak to Barry and Keith pmsl and Barry the little fucking pervert still brings that up.
3)Can it be porn? I think this is where the curiosity came from it was basically a woman getting changed in a shop changing room and another woman came in to "help" her and it ended in a 3 way all women with toys.
It can't be porn um then any sex scene from 91/2 weeks or oh yeah from 300 ( I love gerard butler) where the king & queen of sparta get it on.
Oh my God and if you've never seen ShortBus-crazy crazy film, Jelly I think you should see it lol, you will find it um interesting I think.
Actually I dunno I mean there's the Hunger with the scene between susan sarandon & catherine deneuve or the Wild Things, so many to choose, I'm going with the Hunger!
4)Um boring part of Twilight, parts of New Moon cos Edward was gone and I got a bit bloody bored sorry Stan xx
5)My boss the Hobbit or Yeah but no as I call one of the receptionists. Both are a pain in the arse for various fucking reasons and don't use the brains they were born with and don't actually do a lot. Now I know I'm on here but I do work and get my shit done. They are both so blase and just bleurgh, they drive me crazy!!!!
Ok I really need to get my arse in gear, I'm not in monday at work so busy, busy, busy now xxxx Laters x
Hey kids...Happy Fucking Friday!! WOOT WOOT
1. I lurve soft core dom stuff. Not all bondage beating leather and chains ball gag shit, just ordering around - hair pulling stuff, etc...
2. I have been caught having sex with someone else but not by myself...nothing exciting to report here.
3. Hmmm...I love porn and I know you horny biatches out there like it too so don't judge but if we aren't picking a flesh flick then I would have to say the Secretary (see question #1) or Unfaithful...*drool*.
4. Breaking Dawn...'nough said.
5. Some days my husband provokes this sort of rage...however most times it is just clients at work. Some day I'm going to leap across the counter and cut a bitch.
1. What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy?
It'd have to be me and two men, it's never gonna happen but I like the thought cos in my fantasy i'm slim and sexy with no stretch marks or cellulite etc. I do sometimes wish i'd tried a bit of girl on girl in my youth too.
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Tell us a detailed account of what happened.
Nope never been caught
3. Describe one of your favourite movie sex scenes?
OOh Brokeback mountain, I like a bit of man on man ;)
4. Was there a part in the Twilight saga that you bored with? If not, were there parts that you felt so angry with you wanted to rip the pages out and burn them - choose one that pissed you off the most - but it cannot be Isle Esme because technically those pages are already missing, and we were all upset by them, so it must be something else.
I don't like the baby talk bit on the beach, eww eww ewww
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them? You know, stuff like ripping their hair by the root, punching them in the face, choking them to death, that kinda stuff?
Yes my Sister in law. I deserve a fucking Oscar for my performances when I have to be around her ;)
Good Q's xxx
Rolf@Mary wish I'd had a bit of girl on girl in my youth
Just to put any maybe teeny tiny worries you or Stan may have when we finally get together for our curry therapy session-as you say it is just fantasy and it ain't gonna happen lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Series 2 on True Bloof on FX tonight so I dunno if I'll be about. Just got home and there's a birthday card on the mat whooo, excited moi-noooooooooo pmsl
PMSL@Nibbles I would never dream of inflicting the sight of me naked on anyone other than Mr Mary anyway so I think we're all safe ;)
I've seen series 2 of Tb and it's soooooooooo good! It's pure filth in parts, fanfuckingtastic wooooohoooooooooo
Loving your answers hos.
Here are mine.
1. This one made me think, LoL. I would love to try some more hard core BDSM stuff, like the things in the red room of pain in MotU.
2. Nope. A few times I had a parent knock on the door while I was in the bathroom, asking me if I was alright, but that's about as close as it got. But a friend walked in once on me having sex, as did my brother.
3. Well, just last week I watched Atonement, per SV's recommendation, and holy shit was that scene in the library hot. It was one of the best directed sex scenes ever. I even moaned audibly.
4. Yes. It was when Jasper remembers how he became a vampire and his early days with that ho whose name I forget. Honestly, I skipped over that part. I just skimmed it. I hated the way he talked. I really wished SM didn't go into such details when that particular part is concerned.
5. Absofuckinglutely. It's my Mother in Law. I've never hated anyone, but I often imagine strangling her. I can see the image very clearly in my head, her faces reddening from my squeeze, her eyes popping, I can hear the gagging sounds she would make while I shook her relentlessly. The bitch! LoL
Okay, these questions were harder to answer than I thought they would be, pmsl.
1) What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy?
Umm..hmmm...well you all know from the post a few weeks ago that Mr. Z and I like a little kinkery and soft dom in the bedroom and are equipped as such. It is a little too soft right now to my tastes, but he is slowly catching on. He just doesn't have all this great reading material I do for inspiration! But the one fantasy I can't seem to escape is actually a bit tame, but I really want to do it. The whole meet up at a hotel bar, pretend you are strangers and then get hot and heavy and head upstairs. But I think I am outta luck because Mr. Z and I saw something similar on a program or movie recently and he commented how stupid that was. DAMMIT!
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Tell us a detailed account of what happened.
Hell to the no! Well, I mean never unintentionally, that is. ;p~~~ Here is something tho: My buttons are quite hard to push, especially if I wasn't really in the mood to get it on to start with...those nights I generally need to go another round after Mr. Z is spent. He really seems to enjoy watching it...but he tends to be a bit of a cheerleader, which is actually a bit annoying. It is like hmmm...I wasn't really in the mood to begin with, but now I got halfway there and am frustrated, so now I am having to bring out the heavy artillary, and you are there telling me "cum baby cum baby." Ok, there are times when that is really hot...in this situation, not so fucking much!
3. Describe one of your favourite movie sex scenes?
Ummm...okay, is it weird that the only thing that comes to mind is The Big Lebowski when The Dude spits out his White Russian when Juliane Moore says she is trying to conceive?? LOL!! With all the kids in the house we don't get much opportunity to watch anything too racy.
4) Twilight saga boredom:
Yeah, too many parts to really mention here. I can't say exactly, but I definitely find myself skipping chappys a lot. It has actually been a LONG time, thanks to FF, since I have read them, except Twilight which I just reread. I totally skimmed the beach chapter.
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them? You know, stuff like ripping their hair by the root, punching them in the face, choking them to death, that kinda stuff?
Yes, that would be the birth moms of my two step children. One I never have to deal with but the other one I do, and her stupidity astounds me to no end. On the upside, my stepson turned 17 last month and my stepdaughter turned 17 today (yeah, do THAT math) so I only have one more year to deal with them. WooHoo!!!
@Jelena: Suhweet...I have a Netflix Atonement sitting by my DVD player as we speak. Guess i know what I am watching tonight! LOL!
Afternoon hos! Hope you are out of the cranky box soon Stan. We love you!
Jelena..great questions. Let me get started.
1)Fantasy---get grabbed while at a party with my husband and have sex in a closet with a stranger.(sound familiar Jelena? that's when i knew we would be good friends ;-)
2)No..never been caught because i can't tell you the last time I ever did. i don't own dildos or anything like that. I know...boring.
3)Hottest sex scene: It's totally crazy..and not even all that hot, but the scene in Daredevil with Ben Affleck where he plays a blind super hero. I know. Crappy movie..but he was blind and Jennifer Gardner and him have hot sex and I KNEW they would get together after that. Aaaaand now they're married. Go figure.
4)The whole Volturi fight scene at the end of Breaking Dawn. I swear i have never even read it. Shut the book.
5)Pisses me off the most...slow people. Slow walkers, slow talkers...slow thinkers. I want to slap them and say "HURRY THE FUCK UP!!!!"
@Stan: sorry to hear you are feeling crappy. Hope you get better soon!
1. My wildest fantasy, would be to have a three-some. I dunno if it'll ever happen, though. I won't say it'll NEVER happen, because in the last year or so, I've done a lot of things that I said I would never do, sexually. I think I'd like to have another woman in there with us...but then, I'm unsure that I'd be able to handle my emotions (read:Jealousy) at seeing my Husband with another woman. I'm not sure if I'd like to add another man...and I know Mr. TW doesn't want to. Yes, we've discussed this to some extent. As far as naming who I'd like her to be. (Sorry, TigerlilyRose...it isn't you. That would just be too weird.)
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Not really. I've staged it so Mr. TW will "catch" me (a situation that always ends pleasantly) but I've never REALLY been caught.
3. My favorite sex scene? You know, I really wish I could name something that everyone reads and goes "ohhhh, yeah. I loved that one..." but honestly I'm drawing a blank. The only thing I can think of is the first porno I watched and how amazingly hot it was and how turned on I was. It was a woman on a black baby grand piano...she did a lot of fingering herself and he ate her and fucked her and it was HOT!! Of course, I was 16, and it was the first porn I'd ever watched and (the future) Mr. TW was with me and man that night was hot!!! Ahhhh...the memories you've brought back to me, Jelena. *happy sigh*
4. In BD, when Jacob went off on his own, and went to the park, etc. BOOOOOORRRRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGG!! And totally irrelevent. There are probably others, but that's the one that sticks out in my head at the mo.
5. Let me set this up before I tell you who I'd like to bash in the face on a daily basis...My youngest daughter (she'll be 3 at the end of next month) goes to an in-home day care with a 60(ish) year old lady and her daughter-in-law. I have no doubts that the older lady loves my daughter dearly. However...the daughter-in-law (I will call her Bitch Face) is another matter. I've seen her single out my daughter several times for doing the same thing other kids are doing...for instance, they are all chasing each other around the table (running is not allowed in the house) but as soon as Faye joins in...she gets yelled at for running. Nothing is said to the other kids who were running first... There are a lot of little things, and it's been going on for about 2 years now. I realize that my daughter isn't perfect. She can be a brat. But I also know that Bitch Face just plain doesn't like Faye...I can accept that (sort of.) I know what it's like to not like a child. (Yeah, I said it.) But that doesn't mean she has to be mean to her. This has really amplified in this last week and it's to the point that Faye is starting to act differently than normal. (I know, I know...get her into a different day care. Realize that I live in a tiny town...seriously, it makes Forks look like a fucking metropolis. There are only about 600 people in this town, so finding a new day care isn't as easy as that.) But I digress...I would like to fucking throat punch Bitch Face on a daily basis, but I restrain myself because I'm sure that would not make things better for my little girl. Well *sigh* thanks for letting me get that off my chest, Jelena! Hopefully, my day will not suck ass anymore now that I've gotten that out!! *grin*
Let me apologize for writing a fucking novel here, and I wanted to mention that when I write a long comment, I always write it in Word or in my email drafts and copy/paste it in. That way if blogger desides to be an ass munch and eat it (or whatever) I still have a copy and Someone had that problem yesterday, but I didn't have the time then to suggest that.
OK, girls...off to read your answers now!
@Twiweasel---I wish I lived up the fucking block so your little girl could run all over my house. Damn...that pisses me off.
I'd like to redo my #5--because i didn't mention a specific person. I would have to say my daughter's godfather (friend of the family) for all the reasons I mentioned above.
Oh Sweet Virgin Mary, how many questions are there??? Okay, here I go.
1) Not very wild, but being I write so much Dom/Sub context in my story, um... I dunno. I MIGHT be into a little blind fold here, a little spanking there..
2) No, I don't masterbate. Fuck, if I thought it would work, I'd be on it like fly on shit.
3) Movie sex scenes; For some reason, it's not always graphic. The scene in Departed where Leo gets busy with his psychologist. Argh! He looked his best ever, and damn, I had a severe urge to dry hump the tv. That is a hot movie sex scene.
4) Reading the books, any Jacob POV bugged the fuck out of me and bored me to tears.
5) All people generally irritate me, as I think most people that surround me are either ax murderers, or whores. No, I don't take medication either. :)
Good morning everyone.
@Jelena nice questions and @Stan for picking good photos
@fanficzombie - you'r Big Lebowski comment has me grinning.
@Mrs. P I never thought of you as a no dildo girl
1) Yes it's boring but I'll have to go with being fucked by two men at the same time eg. Chasing Amy with the chinese finger trap. It will never happen but I can always dream, just like my husband dreams of being with two women.
2)Been caught masturbating?
Actually yes. I have to say this is one of the most embarrassing questions I've had to answer despite all the sex stuff, including positions, that we describe.
I used to share a room with my sister until I was 17. The first time I remember being 7 and waking up with one of my dolls underneath my genitalia and realizing that felt good was my downfall. I don't remember how many times I must have done that as a child or teenager while my sister was still in the same room, supposedly asleep. Once I was in the living room on a Sunday afternoon where I thought the whole family was sleeping. I must have been about 10. I had some fun with a doll of mine and then remember turning around because I heard a noise and my sister was standing in the doorway. Needless to say totally mortified and will never speak of this again.
I wish I'd been caught as an adult by some hot handyman who proceeds to strip me down and have wild passionate sex but that isn't the story. Sigh
3)Have you ever watched Lust, Caution? It's a movie by Ang Lee (who did Brokeback) but is Chinese focussing around a girl who has to become the mistress of a high up traitor with the Japanese during the war. He has a thing for pain but in the end they fall in love and she gives her life for him. There is a scene in there where they are fucking sideways and talking about how she needs him to get her an apartment. It is very racy for a film with Asian actors and quite hardcore. I love how they are sweaty and talking so realistically that you really do think they're having sex (apparently there is quite a bit of controversy about the filming of this scene and how naked they are).
4) I'm bored by the whole Quileute legend thing. I always zoom right past it. Sorry but I don't like Jacob so 70% of New Moon as well is a waste.
5)Is it bad to say I have a few people I know who could help themselves but don't. They complain and I could so easily solve their problems for them but they don't want to listen (sometimes applies to patients). I know this is so not the "women listen to each other without offering advice the way men do" mantra that we should live by but I can't help it - I spend my life trying to make people better.
Right not read anyones yet, so here goes...
1. What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy?
I quite like the scene in 9 & 1/2 weeks ( I know, showing my age!!)where Kim B is blindfolded and he brings in a woman to 'play' with her. I often think about that!
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Tell us a detailed account of what happened.
Only by husband. Who knew he could get down the stairs so quick, lol! I may or may not have been lounging on the settee watching something naugty.
3. Describe one of your favourite movie sex scenes?
No I can't think of any!!
I like the bit in the car in Titanic ( I love Leonardo).
I am sure there are more, but my mind is blank!! I am in a hurry, so I reserve the right to answer this later, lol!
4.Was there a part in the Twilight saga that you bored with?
I get bored with the whole 'burning man' bit in breaking dawn. That bit is far too long, yawn...
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them? You know, stuff like ripping their hair by the root, punching them in the face, choking them to death, that kinda stuff?
No, I don't feel that way about anyone I know. Thank god!!
(posting b4 reading everyone's answers.. then going to read CFF)
1. What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy? Since reading FF, there are oh so many… but I guess I’d have to say I’d like to recreate the dom/sub scene from ‘the submissive’ – where BxE go back to E’s former dom Beth for a scene– (I don’t want to give too much away for those folks haven’t read it)
2. Caught masturbating? Thankfully no!
3. Favourite movie sex scenes?
I guess we’re not talking about porn, right? I’m gonna steal mr. jalya’s favorite.. it’s not really a sex scene- but its kinda hot. The scene in 9 ½ weeks where they (Mickey Rourke and Kim Basinger) are feeding one another stuff from the fridge and they get all messy & dirty and are making out all over the place .. (and i'm not one to include food w/ sex.. such a waste of good food!)
4. Was there a part in the Twilight saga that you bored with?
Yes a few.. but the one that comes to mind is in Breaking Dawn. When Jacob runs out of the house after Edward hears Nessie’s thoughts. The whole bit where Jacob ends up at a county fair, droning on & on and is looking for someone to imprint upon. Honestly- I could have cared less. Don’t get me wrong – I am a fan of the book Jacob (shyt mr. jayla is 6’7” – like Jacob in the book… I like a big man) I was even rooting for him a bit.. but that wandering in the woods.. in pain & agony…. I was soooo over it
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them?
Honestly- I don’t see the person but once in blue moon, but she is “THE” bitch from high school. (I grew up in a small town, went to a really small school- my classmates & I have known one another since diapers- ya know they all married one another too.. whatever.) This chick was bitchy for no reason. She was uber popular- but ugly & shallow beyond belief- almost like Rosalie in some FF (but w/o the beauty, money & body). If I saw this chick today (the last time I saw her was 10 years ago @ a wedding) I’d still want to slap a burger in the anorexic bitch’s mouth. Funny- she had the audacity to send a friend request on FB.. LOL, as if.
@Nibbles: LOL gawd I swear i didn't read answers first and I've already seen THREE things (the girls, porn & 9 1/2 weeks) that are way too similar.
1. Wildest yet to be fantasy? Ummm.er...I will admit to fantasizing about having a DP with two guys. But my slutty days are over so it is just a fantasy...LOL
2. Never been caught masturbating.
3.Favorite smexy love scene in movie? 9 1/2 weeks or Basic Instinct...I guess I am drawing a blank on any others
4. Boring part of Twilight Saga? UGH, New Moon..most of it...was so slow and boring for me...I like Jacob (the character) but I love Edward and I kept slogging through NM cuz' I knew sooner or later I would get back to him.
5. Well the list is short but horrid! Most of these people I never see anymore, thankfully. Hate the most is probably my EX sister in law. My bro in law's ex. She is a terrible person and Horrid mother and when Mr TL and I started dating she tried to break us up claiming I was having an affair with a married man. That I was a slut and a money whore and he needed to get rid of me. Bitch nearly got her way too, but he just couldn't stay away from me! HA! The true reasons for her hatred was jealousy. She had a thing for Mr TL...her Brother In Law for Craps sake! After we got VERY serious and were having a baby and getting married, she left my brother in law and took off with the kids. But she still dumps them on my 71 year old mom and dad in law when it suits her. She pulls them out of school because it is convenient for her, this summer/fall my niece had head lice for three months because her mother is worthless and wouldn't treat it properly. She just kept blaming it on my mom and dad in law. I had to contact their school and have the school nurse check them so that I knew it would get taken care of. My husband let them live in his house out here on the farm for FREE while he lived away for several years. They trashed it SOOO bad, we had to tear it down. She never cleaned the bathtub, it was brand new when they moved in and when we got it back it was BROWN. I HATE her with so much venom, I will cry for joy if she ever dies! Then I will have to probably raise the kids (cause my bro in law is an idiot) but I know they would be taken care of! Filthy Bitch that she is...hope she rots in hell!
Well, I feel better now...LMAO...K, off to read the other FFF responses and the CFF updates since last night! Snogs!
@ Stoney - Your answer to # 5 would have been my answer if we hadn't had all this shit going on this week!
@ Mrs. P - I have found that a dildo is a fantastic stress releiver. Just sayin. Thanks for the Day Care offer...if you were up the block, I'd def take you up on it. Or even better, we'd leave the kids with the Hubby's and go out for Diet Coke and Captain...
@TwilightCupcake - Holy Shit! You were 10?!?! Shit, I think I was about 15 before I realized that I could make myself feel good...
@TwiWeasel Growing up in the very town you live in and knowing Bitch Face...GRRRR...I just want to drive over to your house every morning and watch Faye for you! Your girls are like nieces to me and I am so pissed right now! ARGH! I knew you were having issues, but the fact that it is starting to affect Faye is just WRONG!
No offense taken at not being your threesome choice...that WOULD be super weird for all involved, like being with your brother and sister or something...eeeew. Plus I know from personal experience that threesomes and friendships are a VERY bad combination!
@TC whoo! caught at age TEN--early bloomer weren't you!
Great questions Jelena! Love reading everyone's fantasy and who they hate!
Glad i am not the only one who likes a bit of 9 1/2 weeks, lol! I don't feel so old after all!!
@Jelena fab questions! I love reading how depraved we all are! ( or would like to be!)
@Stan hope you feel better soon!
@ Tigerlily - Thanks babe! We've got to do something, and soon. Bitch Face knows I'm mad at her. In fact, she's been avoiding me whenever I drop Faye off! I sense a major conflict coming...
@ all - I really need to watch this 9 1/2 Weeks Movie. I've heard good things about it since High School! LOL
@TwiWeasel its when Micky Rourke looked normal and hot, lol!
FANTASTIC ANSWERS!
I enjoyed so much reading them.
Interesting to see so many of you mention 9 1/2 weeks, and it's interesting to see how many of you want a threesome. I will address this issue in one of the next posts on my blog.
TC is absolutely right. If you haven't seen Lust, Caution, do so now. It's one of the best films ever. Ang Lee is a God.
I am also more than thrilled that #5 provided an outlet for you. If I had not been ranting to everyone about my MIL for the past year or so, I probably would've written a novel too.
@Mrs.P. - a shocker - you don't own a dildo? Gasp. Next thing you're gonna tell me is you don't have a whip.
@TC - Imma use the Wease's words: 10? Wow! That explains a lot, pmsl. Well, I must say, I too found out the same way as you that touching down there feels good. I accidentally rubbed one of my Barbie dolls against my private parts, and was totally taken back. I think I was maybe 9 when this happened. But I didn't start masturbating then, only a couple of years later. In between, I had Ken and Barbie do all sorts of abominable things to one another, even played Master and Servant.
I wish I could answer everyone, but I can't right now.
@ Becky - OMG...how long ago was that?! LOL
@ Jelena - Barbies...brings back memories that I must have repressed. *grin* I remember taking them in the tub with me...hmmmm...I must have been closer to 10 than I thought!! But it wasn't actually masturbating...yet. (Oh, and my Gymnastics Barbie liked to hang from the uneven bars with Ken,s face between her legs.)
Poor Stan. I hope she's feeling better soon.
@TW - I did some nasty stuff to those barbies. Had lots of them and only one Ken. Can you imagine the possibilities? And then, one day, Ken's head fell off, but I had another plastic, not so good Ken that my mom bought for me, only that one was black. So I took his head and stuck it on the white Ken who had a better body. Still have him: my Ken with white body and black head, LoL.
@TwiWeasel I know! But he was hot once, honest! Take a look here
@ Jelene - Oh the imagery!! LOL My Ken's arm broke off, so I took an ugly skirt, tied a knot in one end and shoved the knot into the arm hole! Weren't we creative little shits?
@ Becky - Holy shit! Is that Micky Rourke? Yummy!
@jelena I have the Barbie Bella and Edward if you need to borrow them for personal use. JK. Those darn dolls. My bed was covered with stuffies when I was little. All of you with little girls be warned.
HAHAH LOVE the Breaking Dawn scene still!!! I SO hope they put it in the movie like that! I wonder if we could sneak chimpsten on set somehow ... it'd be like an easter egg for all her fans :)
1. What is your wildest, yet to be lived, sexual fantasy?
Too many to list here.
2. Ever been caught masturbating? Tell us a detailed account of what happened.
Nope
3. Describe one of your favourite movie sex scenes?
I can't remember specifically but there was a movie called Wild Orchid (ironically another Mikey Rourke movie).
4. Twilight saga boredom:
The Quillete stories around the camp fire upon additional readings - I read it all the first time through.
5. Is there someone that you know who constantly makes you think violent thoughts, like every time you see them?
As in questions #1, too many to list here and reading that statement just makes me sad.
I was sad not to see Stan's comments, because it means she's not feeling well.
But I've decided on a winner, even though it was really a tough choice to make.
I am going to go with TC because of her answer to the masturbation question. It's not because she started at such a young age, which definitely did make me go wow, but because she shared with us, even though she said this was the most embarrassing question she had ever had to answer. Every day I find out more and more just how kinky this girl really is, and I'm LUUURVING it.
I thank you all for participating and entertaining me. I loved reading about your fantasies, about who you dream of offing. And, TC's and Nibbles' masturbation stories will amuse me forever. =)
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