Thursday, 8 October 2009

Why men with green eyes aren't always a good thing

I share the news that all is not well at Casa Stan this morning.  There I was, having just merrily posted advice (ha!) in a comment to Latchkey Wife's deliberations on how to break the news of her Twitardedness to her S/O, when Mr Stan appears downstairs ready to go to work.

Now I know that the Rob thing has been niggling away at Mr Stan for a while now.  He makes a fair number of snide comments about Rob that I usually ignore.

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Mr Stan was less than thrilled when Stan purchased new furniture for the master bedroom in anticipation of her relationship with RPattz moving up a notch



"Do you think you could maybe spend some time with me tonight?" he asks me.   I look up at him, feigning innocence.
"What do you mean?"
"Well last night you spent all night on the computer, what about me?"
"Erm, you were watching TV, that's why I was on the computer.  You didn't say anything, I'm not a mindreader," ;o)
"You spend all day and all night on there looking at him."   Oh dear, he's starting a proper rant now.



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Stan felt it unreasonable of her husband to suggest that she spent an excessive amount of her time looking at RPattz online




I put on my best 'aghast' face. "I do not!  I was chatting to people!"
"Yes, about HIM!"

And with that he closes the door to reveal Rob Corner, my little hidden space, and rips one of my posters off the wall!!!

GAH!.
"Ha!  You needn't think I'm going to spend anytime with you now, I can't believe you did something so pathetic!"  Yes, you heard me right.  How pathetic is it that he actually ripped one of his 32yr old wife's numerous posters of a 23yr old actor off the kitchen wall?!   For one scary moment I did actually think that I might cry.  I didn't  which was a relief, obviously I'm not as bad as I thought I was.


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Mr Stan was wondering who the kids were getting their new style of dressing from...


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...until Stan pointed out that it was him, circa 1996!  Who'd have thought it, RPattz inspired by Mr Stan!


So now I'm left with a dilemma.  Do I do the adult thing and spend the evening sitting in front of the TV watching some shitty TV programme of his choosing or do I punish him for his crimes against Robsession with the poster by spending another evening on the computer and making sure he knows the reason why?
Any advice??!

I've already extended an olive branch by emailing him the link to http://www.jealousydestructionfeeling.com/ with an attached picture of Irish TV cook / MILF (apparently) Rachel Allen. 

In the meantime I might print this out, put it up somewhere and see how long it takes him to notice. Muhahahaa!


13 comments:

TwitardedMom said...

IDK much about your relationship. I would definitely spend some time with my Mr. thinking it would pave the way to his being more understanding. Men can be so sensitive. This affair with Rob will not be going away anytime soon so one way or another you and the Mr have to find a way to make this love triangle work. A little attention & flattery might make him more understanding. IMHO

Twichotic said...

Did you happen to eaves drop on my conversation with my DH last night? I SWEAR we had the same exact conversation!! And I had the same exact decision to make... stay on the computer Facebooking/Tweeting/Reading blogs about Twilight (oh and sneaking in a bit of fanfic) while he watches shitty TV and most likely have another "disagreement" before bedtime OR suck it up and close the laptop and watch Top Chef with him. I chose the latter...sigh. I decided I should put real life in front of Twilight this time. It sucked. ;)

Stan, Thanks for confirming that I'm not alone! We seem to be having the same "discussions" with our spouses.

Stan said...

@ TwitardedMom, thanks, men eh??!

@ Twichotic, that is spooky indeed, especially as it's always cookery shitty tv my DH wants to watch too! *yawn*. Think I'll end up having to do the same tonight. Oh joy!

Snarkier Than You said...

hmmmm... compromise, aye??? how about watching tv together, no computer/etc., but you watch twilight??? too much?? lol!

i get it - this whole thing IS time consuming! maybe watch a movie that you'll both like (er, not that you'll like as much as twi) and take a break for the greater good - then there's the weekend to catch up, right?

: )

great pics btw - face-in-hole one is a total win! hehe...

Stan said...

Ha! I win! He just phoned to ask if he was still in the doghouse and if it was ok to come home tonight hehe! I guess that I can spare him some time tonight seeing as I get his guilt trip as a trump card ;o)

Mary said...

Oohhh i'd definately have to punish him for the poster. Just something gentle, like a bit of ground glass in his dinner! Too much? How about a nice juicy bogey in his pie?
MUAHAAAHAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAA

Mrs. P said...

Bwahahahaha!!! The bunk beds actually made me almost pee myself a little...I loved it. Good stuff!!! (I'm guessing Mr. Stan gets the top bunk ;-)

(Molly) Twinatic said...

If it were me, I would probably tell him:
1) he had to buy me a new poster since he wrecked mine,
and
2)that if he wanted, we should pick how many nights a week are cave bear time, and how many are together time (either specific nights, tu and th are do your own thing, wed and fri are hang out together, I pick the activity wed, you pick the activity fri, or whatever). So he feels like even if you're neglecting him, he knows that on (whichever day you pick) he's going to get some attention.

also, I find it works pretty well to get yourself worked up over fanfic and then taking it out on him. He might not mind your cave bear nights if he gets a good romp out of it!

Z Any Mouse said...

I thought I was doing a good job of hiding my Robsession until I was watching the Teen Choice awards (of course using my 10 year-old daughter/Jonas Bros. as an excuse) when hubby hears RPattz' name announced and he comes running into the t.v. room to check him out. There he is, looking at my obsession, seeing everything that he is not. Young, incredibly hot, and in great shape (no bay window here, baby). I've tried to keep it as low-key as possible, don't want any hurt feelings, and I've fooled myself into believing he hasn't seen any of the 4-5 Rob pics I have stashed around my sewing room (my work station)
I would be really pissed off if Mr. Any Mouse defiled any of my Rob treasures, but my advice to you is to get the latest Sports Illustrated swimsuit model poster, and paste a nice picture of Rob's face over hers. That should make everyone happy :D

TwiWeasel said...

OH MAH GAWD!! I seriously gasped out loud when I read that he ripped your poster off the wall...did he do irrepairable damage? And which one, the Rob or the Edward...not that I've been stalking and looking in your windows or anything *whistles nonchalantly*

Love your new bedroom set!! bunkbeds = jungle gym.

Is it a fucking full moon...is that why all the husbands are acting like pouty, whiny babies all of a sudden? We were just talking about this at work, and apparently it's not just Twisessed wives who are having problems! We just have...er...different problems in addition to the same old crap.

*sigh* I suppose it might be a good idea to spend some additional time with him. Of course, at my house, if I'm not on the computer, he is! (I honestly think he's only on there to keep me away!!)

I agree with (Molly)Twinatic...I have found that getting myself worked up on fan fic, as she put it, and taking it out on him can work wonders on a crappy attitude! Do it enough and he'll figure out the pattern: You read FF, he gets some. It's a fairly easy equation!

Good luck tonight!!

(Molly) Twinatic said...

Also, found the Twilight RiffTrax last night, HILARIOUS, it may help!!!! Spend some time with hubs, laugh your ass off, make him feel a bit bigger to have heard Twilight get made fun of all night.

Read more HERE

Twilove1 said...

So far, my husband thinks I just have a thing for Twilight in general and doesn't realize that it's about 99.9% Rob. We're still at the point where my family teases me with lots of eye rolling and when they want to get my attention they call out "Robert Pattinson!!" to make me look at them. I think it may be now be time to hang up a few strategically hidden posters, but no way am I confessing my fanfic obsession!

Stan said...

@ Molly, will have a look at that link soon :o)

@ Twilove1, love that your family shout Rob's name to get your attention! LOL! And I think you're right about the fanfic, only for the very understanding people out there.