I'm an old skool vampire....apparently

Hi my chickarino's, my little hootchie ho bags, how are we today? Well its Stan's wedding anniversary so congrat's on 8 years to you. Now if this picture had been real I'm sure you'd be strutting round in your sexy lingerie & heels preparing scrumptious little er tit (ahem) bits for Rob to eat when he got back from a hard days filming. Just like you're doing for Mr Stan right?.....er right Stan?

Yeah, in your dreams Mrs, he's mine, back off ho!

Right so where were we? Oh yes old skool vampires. Remember those before Mrs Meyer came along and turned our view of vamps on its head? Yes you do, c'mon, vampires couldn't go out in the sun, they couldn't deal with crosses, crucifixes, etc. Even in TB they reckon all that is crock but they still can't go out in the day.

So there I was yesterday, happily lying in the sun in my back garden/yard, a lovely cool breeze blowing so I didn't realise how hot it was.......and I fell asleep, oh yes, good and proper. Did I sparkle in the sun? Did I fuck, no I burned baby, I burned good which is why I have decided that I'm definately old skool and not a twinkly newbie!

This was taken this morning, see I glow, no sparkling lol

and this was last night...it didn't calm down any did it despite numerous applications of after sun and then this morning I discovered I still had some bio oil so that went on too...yes it is still very sore but it serves me right I guess.

Talking of old skool vampires, when I did my VILF post I was told off for leaving some out lol so here is Spike for those who missed him, he definately couldn't go out in the day

There is a certain something about him isn't there, I do prefer Angel, but Spike ain't bad!

Lestat from Queen of the Damned...anyone fancy a bite of him. I preferred him to Tom Cruise.

Antonio Banderas as Armand in Interview with the Vampire

Shane Brolly (unfortunate name though apt for Edbrella lol) as Kraven from Underworld

However my favourite vamp that can't go out in the sun has got to be.....

Mr Tall, blonde and rockin the black vest Eric

Oh yes Mr Skarsgard I wanna do bad things with you so very, very badly...as they say waiting sucks so HBO give us series 3 in UK NOW!!!!!!

Stephenie Meyer is fed up with vampires!!!!!!!!!!!

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo   She has to finish Midnight Sun

                                                                             
                                               How could you??!! and that's a fucking ugly dress btw

 Anyway this is what she said
"I know that's what everyone cares about. I also know that the right answer would be for me to say 'Oh yah, it's done! And it'll be out next month!' But that's not true. It's also not true that I've got a ton of work done on it, and that's what I'm working on. What's true is that I'm really burned out on vampires. And, I don't want to write it badly. So I want to wait until I'm excited about the material again, and I'm excited about Edward, and that it's something that's motivating. You know, when a story is keeping me up at night, and I'm waking up at 4 am in the morning and thinking 'Yes! That is what should happen in this moment!' Then that is when I can write with happiness! So, right now it feels like homework … it really does. And when things feel like homework they go very, very slowly for me. That should disappoint everyone!"


I've read The short second life of Bree Tanner and I have to say I really enjoyed it. It was interesting to get a bit of background on the "bad vamps". I really was hoping that SM would do similar things for the other Twilight characters. I'd love to read more about James *drool*

                                                                                
                   whilst picturing him like this, obv

Who would you like to hear more about?

Friday Fun Fiiiiiiive...Friday I'm in love

Hi ladies and ho bags (nods to Lady M) how's it hanging? Mine is not hanging so well, I've been a bit crap with my diet this week. I hate dieting, I loathe it, I love food, unfortunately any food. I like indian, chinese, mexican, italian, english, spanish, whatever I just love food, savoury or sweet sigh....I have crap willpower too. Funny when I stopped smoking I just stopped, when I stopped drugs many, many years ago I just stopped but food...OMG why, why do you have to be so good, smell so good, taste so good. Why do I like cooking...arghhhhhhhh. Right now that I have that off my chest we can carry on to the good stuff....last weeks winner was the lovely and beauteous TigerLilyRose (hi 5's) as picked by the equally gorgeous Starlitviolets (bumps hips) so over to TLR...(pushes in direction of stage...psssst you're on) My comments are in red as per usual...

What...you don't wanna talk? You just want to ask the questions? Ok....jeez TLR you're never this shy when we're on our own...oops let that slip didn't I hehe.

1) If you were an animal, what animal would you most likely be? (If I was an animal...hunny..please...I AM an animal bwahahaha)

Yeah ok, I know I couldn't find a picture of him as an animal sigh

Yeah I also know you have seen this but fuuuuck, this does things to me so bad am I forgiven for crappy lion lamb thing now?

2) How many hours a day do you spend online...(not working) i.e. surfing, FF, Twitter, IM, Email, etc. These should be interesting answers from some of you lmao

She reminds me of someone....

3) We have all heard dirty limericks like....There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose cock was so long he could SUCK it, He said once with a grin, Whilst wiping his chin, If my ear were a cunt I would FUCK it.

Write a dirty limerick about a Twilight character...

No passes....think of a poem!!!

4) Name the one thing your S/O could do that you could not forgive. (even if you know they wouldn't really do it)

I would seriously do shit like this.....and he knows it lol

5) If you were stuck in an elevator with a Teletubby, Barney, Spongebob, and Stewie from the Family Guy, which one would you kill first?

Oh, oooo, ooooh yeah, that feeels soooooo gooood

So there you have it people the friday fun five...with actually 5 questions as opposed to 6, 7, extra credit etc, I think I started a trend the day I accidentally did 6 questions lol. Do we love the FFF that much we just want more questions pmsl. Can't wait to read some of these answers. TLR...brilliant if I may say so!!

I had to show you the one with the hood down...owned..

Community FanFic Thursday

Hello!  Hello! *Waves arms to get attention*  Hey!  I'm down here, yep, a bit lower, past his nose...lips...chin...That's it!

It's that time again ho's!  This week's starter is by Becky :o)

I was having the best night ever......

It was my 21st birthday and I was dancing at a club with my two best friends, Alice and Rose. We'd been out all night and by now we were more than slightly drunk. I should have been embarrased by the way we were dancing, especially since half the club seemed to be watching us now, but I couldn't give a fuck! It was my birthday after all.

Rose was behind me, with her hands resting on my hips. When she leaned in to talk to me, I felt her hot breath on my ear, " "Hey Bella, lets go get a drink. All this dancing has made me thirsty". I laughed at her and replied, " You just want to ogle that guy behind the bar! But ok, I could do with some water." Not that I blamed her, he was hot, if you liked your men big and muscly. We grabbed Alice and made our way through the crowds to the bar.

As I waited for Rose to stop flirting and get our drinks, I felt cold fingers trail up my arm and across my bare shoulders. I gasped and turned round quickly to see who it was. I was met by the most delicious sight ever, dark eyes stared down at me intently surround by the most beautiful face I had ever seen on a man. He reached up and carressed my cheek, " I've been watching you Isabella." Oh, just hearing my name from those perfect lips had me all hot and bothered, " I want you. You need to come with me now." His voice was hypnotic and I found myself nodding my agreement. I know I shouldn't be doing this with a complete stranger, but I seemed to have no control over my actions.

"Tell your friends you are going to the bathroom, dont let them come" He looked at me expectantly, waiting for me to act . I quickly explained to Alice where I was going and waved off her offer to join me. "I'm fine, don't worry". I told her, feeling anything but fine!

He grabbed my hand and led me through the club. We were moving too fast for my drunken state and I tripped and felt myself falling. Suddenly I was scooped up in a hard, cold embrace and by the time I had registered what had happened we were through a door and in a dimly lit room.

He put me down and I adjusted my clothes, " Where are....." the words caught in my throat as I turned to look at him, his eyes weren't just dark, they were a dark ruby red and he was looking at me like I was something to eat.

Suddenly I realised this was a very, very bad idea. Oh Shit! ....................

Good one Becky!  Who wants to go first?

Sorry Tay, you ain't got no hammock, I don't want to play.  Hey, I'm fickle, what of it?

WILF's!!! Or Wolfs I'd like to play with, although some may have to have a manicure and put a bag on their head...just sayin!

Oh me, oh my, what a beautiful day it is again here in good old Blighty. The sun is blazing down and its set to stay for a while, YAY!!!! I love the sun, I hate winter, I get so gloomy and fed up but the sun makes me feel so good. I need to move to Florida...I so wish!!

Right yesterday was the VILF post, today is the WILF's turn, ahem, some people may not want to look at this post at all but all fair in love and lust I say.

I want to start out with a relatively new wolf to the game. He is Alcide in the new series of True Blood and OMG what a bloody hunk he is!

Woof! Grrrrrowl, hell yes Mr Herveaux!


Or Joe Manganiello as he is really known as. I'll take either though I do like Alcide's rough, tough persona and longer hair, nom, nom ,nom......hooooooowwwwwl

Um, he's looking a bit more grown up these days, maybe

maybe if I got a bag...

Yeah ok he is looking pretty fucking fit here, hand me the bag and the gloves...I'm going in/on

Ok so Benicio del Torro is not a hunk as such but he definately has something about him

Mmm maybe its the latin look of him, no shirtless ones for love nor money though

We can't have wolves without Mr Huge Ackman as Wolverine lol

Hmmm Huge wet and looking heavenly...wonder if he smells of dog? I've decided I don't care

Ok Hugh, you're son is cute but outta the way kid you're daddy is frickin hot, nom, nom, nom, who needs ice cream, can I lick him please....shoo kid, shoo!

Of course there are those in True Blood who can turn into whatever they want...

Sam Trammell as Sam Merlotte in TB is a good guy who is a true shifter and can change into anything he wants

Not a bad looking guy, but I prefer Eric & Alcide lol, he has boobs here hehe

I couldn't leave out Teen Wolf could I!?

M J Fox was a bit of cutey in his time too

I know he's not a wolf but I bet he could make a gorgeous looking one and I mean he is as hairy as hell anyway. I wouldn't say no to him curling up in my bed and keeping me warm hehe

So who would you want keeping you warm out of this little hairy lot? I'll take Alcide, Rob and Hugh of course, maybe a small side order of Tay, Tay, bagged to go of course lmao

VILF or Vamps I'd Like to hehe

Okay now everyone who knows me in real life knows I am addicted to Vampires and have been for a very long time, in fact they definately coloured my take on men for quite a while lol

First addiction was to Louis from Interview with the Vampire played by Brad Pitt

Oh yes long hair, dark, brooding definately had some effect on me

Vlad can impale me whenever he wants hehe


Looking good Mr Snipes my man!

Buffy came along and Angel grabbed me hard, I fell hook, line and fang for this Vampire!

I got hooked on Underworld and Michael Corvin although technically he was a vamp/were hybrid

Helllooo Mr Speedman...nom

Then I fell and I fell hard for our Precious, the Golden One, Mr Robert Pattinson!

OMG so gorgeous!

Happy Robert means happy me :0)

Just look at that face...just beautiful

Then along came Eric lol, this is what I wanna do to Eric

Eric is just dirty and up for everything, mmmmmm ideal for me!

Oh yes you are Mr Northman x

Party with Alex raise your hand please...Me,me,me,me,meeeeee

and finally courtesy of Budweiser884, a lovely video to one of my favourite songs...Closer by Nine Inch Nails...look away non Eric fans

Friday Fun Five

Sorry this is late in the day people, I've been busy all day helping to make the school float for tomorrow's field day procession.  Anyway, it's all done now, so let the Friday Fun Fuckery commence!

So, last week's winner was Starlit Violets, so over to her:

Round TWO, baby! First - thank you to Banshee713 for picking me! I'm honored. Now - let's get down to business, hos.

1. Tell us one of the nerdiest things about yourself. Feel free to explain.

2. Other than a vampire, what type of mythical creature would you like to be?

Oops, sorry, I read that as 'be with' ;o)

3. You're getting ready to meet your fellow Twihards for an event, what do you bring in your "Survival Kit?"

4. What is the raunchiest, nastiest sexual act you would participate in if RPattz/KLutz/Any other Twi-man-hottie asked?

5. What have the Saga movies done RIGHT?! Come on - I know you liked something in them.

Or someone perhaps?

Extra Credit: What is your stance on vampire teeth? Do you agree that they should be more human, or do you prefer the pointy kind?

Well - that's me finished! ;) I hope I didn't repeat any. I can't wait to read your answers for these! MWAH!!!

-SV