Thursday, 14 January 2010

New merch darkens my doorstep and brightens my day!

I had a phonecall between Christmas and New Year from my old uni friend scuba minx, who sometimes posts on here *waves to scuba minx*.  She had just seen a 3D New Moon poster for sale and wondered if I'd like it?  Erm, do wolves shit in the woods?  Actually I'm not sure about that one, I have wondered.  Maybe Eclipse or Breaking Dawn will enlighten us.  Imagine the entertainment value if the fight scene in Eclipse was filled with vamps accidentally standing in horse manure size piles of wolf shit!  Especially with their enhanced sense of smell.  I think Steph missed a trick with that one, I'm sure it would have given the wolves a definite advantage.

Ok, so these are inflatable but think how could they could look in CGI!

Anyway, I digress.  "Oh, go on then, if I must," I think was my answer ;o).  So, today it arrived!  And she'd done such a fantastic job of wrapping it that it took me a good 20 minutes to get into the bloody thing.  Then I had to wrestle it off Harry who was convinced that it was "MINE!". 

I finally got it to myself in the kitchen and took it off it's cardboard and at that moment I reverted to being about 10 years old.  What did I do first?  Yep, I wobbled it like a wobbleboard.  Not familiar with the wobbleboard?  Well then, you need a lesson on Rolf.

Now, Rolf Harris is a bit of a legend over here.  He's also been known to bear more than a passing resemblance to someone we might recognise:

Now, Rolf is a lovely chap, and I happen to know this because...

Aah, yes, that's me in the flowery dress next to Rolf back in 1996.  That was my lucky dress for a while ;o).  Good times!

So, that's Rolf.  Now, Rolf is renowned for playing the 'Wobble Board', so here he is.  Feel free to picture me in my kitchen wobbling 3D Edward, Bella & Jake (or Bob, Mummy & Jake, as Harry calls them).

Eventually, having got over the novelty of that I managed to find a space for it on my kitchen door.  I then spent a good couple of minutes looking at it from different angles to try and get the full effect.  Crouching, I may have stood on a chair, just general swaying side to side as the image changed.  Just had to have another go now from my chair, honestly, there's hours of fun to be had.

In the end the glare from the window meant you just didn;t get the full effect, so I've put it on the side of the fridge, which suits me because I can see it from here and also put the poster back that I took off the door to make space!

And just because I don't want to leave you scarred by Rolf (he does take a little getting used to), here's something else to scar you instead! 

Oh, go on then, for suffering through today's post you can have this:

Now don't say I never give you anything!  Tune in tomorrow for 'Things that begin with 'th' Thursday'!


NibbleitPattinsonakaNebilet said...

Giant poo, wobble boards, 3D new Moon, not to mention passing gritters-Stan got very fucking excited over that one pmsl!

Ed-brella Towers is a veritable bloody hive of activity today. I'm trying to work but keep getting distracted (ooo shiny) also I have a pic of semi naked Rob from New Moon with his gravity defying pants on and my fingers just lingering around his hips. Well in my world they ARE my fingers. If it was real life it would fucking well be my tongue and lips and the security would be dragging me off while I shout but Rob I love you (oo Ashley-hi)I could do so much for you, come to the attic of the damned...horny with me, TLR and Z, we have duct tape. Kellan and Jaksper are waiting....

Sigh, back to work (ooo soup)

Becky said...

Thank god for the last picture!! I would surely be scarred for life by giant turds & the Rob 'dirty dancing' vid, which however is also the funniest thing i have seen in ages!!
As much as I love Rolfe, I don't want him creeping into my mind when I am fantasizing about the lovely Jackson. That would just be eww..

Can we see your Rob wobble board or doesn't it photo well?

Stan said...

You can Becky, but not today I'm afraid. Mr Stan has gone off to London for work and taken the camera to take lots of exciting Quantity Surveyor type photos of windows and bricks *yawn*

Anonymous said...

3-D Edward on the fridge is awesome!!! I can't wait to see it on the next 'tour'!

Snarkier Than You said...

so i see that first pic over on my dashboard and i'm all "WTF IS that?! hippos wrestling?? giant turds?!" and lo and behold, it's gigantic poop! I don't even want to KNOW what you had to look at when you did whatever google image search you did to find that pic, but I am sure it was horrifying. Thanks for taking that bullet for us, because that pic is hysterical. : )

Stan said...

@ STY, so for me all it takes to get me to a post is the word 'crotch' in the title, for you it's giant poop pics. I suppose I should have expected no less from the Twitarded gals ;o)

Dangrdafne said...

Can't wait for the pic of the poster! Come back soon Mr. Stan!!

scubaminx36 said...

Your very welcome Stan, when ever I see Twilight items I think of you - hence numerous pictures sent to your phone. I hope you get some enjoyment out of the poster. As for the wrapping - I wanted to ensure it got to you in top-notch condition - which I guess it did - happy musings!!!

Jelena @ Twiholic said...

OMG! That fucking video is brilliant, hahahahahaha.

17foreverlisa said...

LMAO!!! I'm with STY. I was scrolling through blog posts via Dashboard and when that picture came up, I thought, "What the hell is that? Walruses?" Too funny!

And based on Rolf's facial expression in that photo, Stan, I'd say you're grabbing his ass. Just sayin'.

I have the 3D Twilight poster still wrapped in plastic. For some reason, I think this stuff is going to be worth something some day. Ya never know. So thanks for the reminder that I need to add the New Moon one to my collection.

And last, but certainly not least, thank you for the reverse eyef*ck picture of Rob. He's not looking at me that way, but I'm definitely looking at him that way ;)


P.S.: Hope you're feeling better today. xxxooo

Z Any Mouse said...

I was going to make some snarky remark about that homeless dude Rolf...and then I watched the wobble board video. I was thoroughly entertained, haha, and will never refer to him as homeless again.

BTW, I am easily entertained. I could spend hours in the airport looking at peoples' socks when they have to take their shoes off for security.

Mary said...

Ewww ewww ewwww I don't ever need to see that video of Rob and Prince ever again! It's a bit wrong if you ask me.

I've gone a bit true blood the last couple of days and have been fantasising (a lot) about Eric ravishing me. Not usually into blondes, but a blonde vamp I can do ;) sexy fucker he is *sigh*

Fab post Stan, looking forward to seeing the poster :)

StarlitViolets said...

PSML!!! Great post, Stan!

I love the 'Wolf Poop' and I completely agree that SM may have missed some great opportunities by leaving out the poo/vamp-sense-of-smell angle.

Wobble-board? Rolf? "Stairway to Heaven?" Oh my! I giggled... a lot.

Thank you for the cleansing pic of RPattz at the end. I'm not sure I could've recovered from the "Dirty Dancing" vid without it. ;)

Stan said...

You know at the end when I put 'une in tomorrow for things that begin with th Thursday? Did nobody think to mention that it *was* Thursday? Because it would appear I lost a day somewhere. Fuck it!

17foreverlisa said...

I thought about it, Stan, but I knew you weren't feeling well and didn't want to bother you :)

Stan said...

You should have done! No excuse for pre-senility! I'd even discussed it with Mary and she hadn't noticed either, we're as bad as each other!